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HR Violation Cards
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Seminary graduation card front artwork

And I’m so glad I don’t have to join a class action against the church because of your actions. The bar was in the catacombs, and you cleared it. Thank you for touching my soul, and nothing else.

hrviolationcards.com · no. 019
Shipping and handling included. Plain unmarked envelope, like contraband.
Card no. 019 · Health & Faith

Who actually buys this card

  • The seminary cohort of the one good mentor
  • Deacons with a sense of humor and a lawyer’s number
  • Anyone who’s read the news and hugged their pastor

If any of those are you, this is your card. Blank inside the back cover so you can make it worse in your own handwriting. Every inside is stamped hrviolationcards.com, so the recipient knows exactly where to send the invoice for their therapy.

More Health & Faith damage
Thanks, DocGet Well Soon!Happy Retirement to My Therapist
Pick your poison

Same sweet front. Three different knives.

The front stays innocent; that’s what lines up the punch. Choose which inside does the damage.

The original
Seminary graduation card front artwork

And I’m so glad I don’t have to join a class action against the church because of your actions. The bar was in the catacombs, and you cleared it. Thank you for touching my soul, and nothing else.

hrviolationcards.com · no. 019
$19.99 Order the original
Take two
Seminary graduation card front artwork

Ordination looks good on me, and a subpoena never looked good on you. Neither of those sentences is an accident. Thank you for everything.

hrviolationcards.com · no. 019
$19.99 Order take two
Take three
Seminary graduation card front artwork

You quoted scripture in every meeting and it was never a deflection from anything. Do you know how rare that is in this industry? Blessed be.

hrviolationcards.com · no. 019
$19.99 Order take three

Satire disclaimer, please actually read this

These cards are satire, and extreme satire at that. They are jokes, written to be as outrageous as possible, and they are not statements of fact about any person, boss, professor, teacher, coworker, clergy member, or company. Nothing on a card describes a real event, and no card is directed at any real individual.

To be completely clear: workplace harassment, abuse of power, and quid pro quo demands are real problems and we do not endorse, encourage, or make light of actual misconduct. The joke is the absurdity of saying the unsayable in a glitter-adjacent greeting card, not the misconduct itself.

Cards contain adult language and themes. Intended for buyers 18 and older who know their audience. If you hand one of these to someone with no sense of humor, HR, or your grandmother, that outcome is entirely on you.